In conversation with Phoebe Gander
After being diagnosed with ADHD, Phoebe Gander realised she needed to prioritise self-care – for her, this meant creating art. She shares her journey of turning this necessary ‘hobby’ into a career.
As told to The Maker’s Story | Photography: Runa Kuru
My name is Phoebe Gander, I’m an abstract landscape and still life artist living at Wainui Beach in Gisborne, New Zealand. I’m originally from the UK but my husband (then fiancée) emigrated here in 2005. We now have three children aged six, 11 and 13. I studied textile design at Falmouth University in the UK, but aside from taking art at school up until that point I didn’t really have formal fine art training.
When I arrived in New Zealand I did do art as a hobby on the side for a while, but once I had children that kind of fell by the wayside and I didn’t really spend much time pursuing creative activities. But then I had some mental health issues – after the birth of my children I suffered from postnatal depression and anxiety – and realised finally after the birth of my third child that I needed to re-introduce an art practice into my life in order to help me overcome what I was dealing with.
Alongside this, my eldest son was diagnosed as falling on the autism spectrum (ASD) and was diagnosed as having both ASD and ADHD. This led me to researching and learning a lot more about neurological differences and after my second son was also diagnosed with ADHD, inattentive type, I realised that I too fit the profile for this – a neurological developmental disorder that stands for ‘attention deficit hyperactivity disorder’. Although inattentive type ADHD does not have the hyperactivity in an external physical symptom, the hyperactivity is actually hidden and it is often mental hyperactivity that’s happening (it was formally known as ADD).
“Once I realised that I needed to prioritise some self-care, I knew creating art was the thing that I had neglected from my life for so long.”
The most common traits of ADHD include: an impaired impulse control, poor attention, poor working memory or the ability to hold information in your mind and follow instructions, poor planning and organisation, difficulties in regulating emotion and self motivation. People with ADHD suffer from dopamine deficiency and are very much interest driven as opposed to results driven. Boredom is the nemesis of someone with ADHD! A lot of the time with females, ADHD (in particular inattentive type ADHD) is not picked up in childhood and often misdiagnosed as anxiety or depression. And those two mental illnesses are often consequences of undiagnosed ADHD, as a result of having to function in a neurotypical world as someone who is neurodiverse.
Having undiagnosed ADHD for most of my life increased my anxiety and depression especially when I had small children to look after, because I found all of the tasks required of me demanded so much extra effort than I physically could give. I was so depleted emotionally and mentally that to look after myself as well as my children became almost impossible – that’s when panic attacks manifested and I had to go to the doctor to try to get to the bottom of things.
Once I realised that I needed to prioritise some self-care, I knew creating art was the thing that I had neglected from my life for so long. I knew I needed to somehow start it up again. Turning this from a hobby, that was purely there to help my mental health, into my job has not been easy for me. But it has come from a place of necessity in that art is the only thing that I am interested in enough to pursue alongside motherhood, and so I had to somehow make it work as a career too. Instagram has been an integral part of allowing me to turn my ‘hobby’ into a career. Living where I do is very isolated, so having access to hundreds, if not thousands of people via Instagram to not only see but also buy my work was basically the only way to make art as a career viable. Not only that, I have also made friends via Instagram and forming this community has been a huge part of it too.
When I first started creating art regularly again in late 2017, when I was just playing with inks and not really thinking about turning it into a career, it was more of a daily escape and a way to invest in myself. However, during this time I started listening to podcasts – in particular the Laura Horn Art Podcast where I started to learn how to do things such as sell work and market myself, etc. Laura recommended a podcast called Art Juice which I started to listen to as well, and from that I joined an online community called ‘The connected artist club’ which is run by Alice Sheridan who is one of the podcast co-hosts. I think podcasts and online communities are an invaluable tool for an artist because they offer so much information and knowledge that you can’t possibly gather alone.
Curiosity has always been one of my biggest strengths and I allowed curiosity to drive my interest in art rather than focusing on the ‘type’ of artist I wanted to be or the ‘style’ of art I wanted to make. I just followed my interests and played with different materials and genres. When I found something I was interested in, I would do more of it. I didn’t set out to be an abstract landscape or ‘still life’ painter – I just wanted to make art that I enjoyed.
In 2021 I realised that I had some gaps in my skills and knowledge having not taken formal training, so I enrolled in the ‘Creative Visionary Program’ run by Nicholas Wilton, which is a three-month online course. It focuses on learning about design, value, colour and the ways that you can use those to create better artwork. I feel that since taking that course, my art has become so much stronger and more personal. The course really made me ask the question of “what am I interested in and why?”. I realised that I’m strongly influenced by nostalgia and by light. This has been a common thread in all my art pieces, and now that I am aware of it I can use it intentionally to influence the type of art I create and be more discerning about the subject matter I choose to paint.
I often get people asking me how I create the type of work that I do, so I would love to share my knowledge and create online courses to teach others what I’ve learned – this is next on my list of desires. Anyone can create art and be an artist – it’s not a talent that only a select few were born with, it’s a mindset and the skills can be learned.
I think generosity as an artist is one of the biggest gifts we can give the world, and I follow the philosophy of “a rising tide raises all ships”. If we share what we know, we can all become better – the world needs art more than ever, and I strongly believe that there is space for everyone in this world to make art.
@phoebeganderart
Wainui, New Zealand
